Friday, September 11, 2020


I believe that "covid-19" is a deliberately anodyne and ultimately deceptive substitute for "Wuhan coronavirus."

I believe the University of Notre Dame was wrong to disavow what (former) Coach Lou Holtz said at the recent Republican National Convention, and wrong to have made Joe Biden and John Boehner co-winners of its once-prestigious Laetare Medal in 2016.

I believe that Raleigh's mayor and police chief are too timid in their kid-glove approach to rioting and vandalism, and neither should say "But Portland" or "But Seattle" because those are low bars to clear.

I believe that journalism has been undone by lazy assertions that devolve into "who you gonna believe, me or your lying eyes?"

I believe that military veterans running for political office should bring more to the table than just their military service.

I believe that comedian Frank De Lima (still with us) and missionary priest Fr. Damien de Veuster (gone to glory & acknowledged as a saint) know more about the spirit of aloha than lots of other people with roots in the Aloha State.

I believe that the Electoral College continues to play a valuable role in American life as an inspired hedge against tyranny of the majority.

I believe that the mountain dulcimer, the autoharp, and the washtub bass are underrated musical instruments.

I believe that most election-year "fact checking" is partisan hackery under color of authority.

I believe that psychological projection and the ability to turn even a balloon animal into a shiv are Democrat superpowers.

I believe that Sister Doctor Colonel Deidre Byrne has the same quiet strength that Mother Teresa did, and that's not a coincidence. 

I believe that "I Believe in Angels" is the most underrated ABBA song.

I believe the Oxford comma still punches far above its weight.

I believe that barbecue sauce should be vinegar-based rather than tomato-based (in this state, that puts me with the East Carolina crowd).

I believe that journalism would improve if there were no journalism schools.

I believe that media relations should be part of the curriculum at every urban or suburban police academy, because trouble always starts when commanders let activists who've never worn a badge frame criminal profiling as racial profiling.

I believe it would be great fun to chat with Mike Rowe, Hershel Walker, and Benjamin Franklin.

I believe that the IPA and the Gose are wildly overrated styles of beer.

I believe that the golden age of comic strips was relatively short, like the golden age of piracy -- but I'm sure glad I grew up in the overlap between Peanuts, The Far Side, and Calvin and Hobbes.

I believe that honest scholars laugh at the idea of "safe spaces" in universities, precisely because learning should be an adventure.

I believe that President Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize.

I believe that singing competitions are silly. But if you insist on having one just for fun, I'll draft Linda Ronstadt, Ann Wilson, and Deborah Liv Johnson for my women's team, and Sam Cooke, Bobby King, and James Keelaghan for my men's team. Then we can sit around appreciating and being uplifted by the talent of a bunch of other people, too.

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